woensdag 13 november 2013

Dear Sarah

Dear Sarah,

I'm sorry I didn't email you earlier this week. I had a very busy work at work. John was supposed to help me with the household chores, but... ah, I'll get to that later.

Please do tell me more about the developments in Peru. How was Ida's birthday? I bet she was really pleased with your present. The pictures of your new family are great. You already look so much part of that family, I hope you don't forget your other sister back in Europe! :-)

I was going to tell you about John and how difficult it is to get him to DO something. I love him in a million ways but the only thing I hate is he's. So. Lazy. As I said my work week was hell (had to run 11-hour shifts pretty much every day) so I counted on him to some work. Guess what, he didn't. The one thing that really drove me mad was that our clothes needed to be washed. Like, really badly. I was even out of fresh underwear! But John just didn't do it. Of course he doesn't refuse to do - I'm sure he totally intends to do it, it just never happens. It's always "later tonight" until eventually it's "tomorrow I'll do it, for sure".

Today I finally managed to get home earlier from work. I could've done it myself, at that point, and at first I wanted to do it. But then I got frustrated that, for the first time I got home at a decent hour all week, I'd have to do the chores that John has been postponing all week. It was his job to do this - he had promised it many times by now - and today I was gonna MAKE him do it. It's not even that much work - just take it all to the laundry (as you know, we don't have a washing machine at our appartment), put it in the machine, sit there for half an hour, and come back.

So shortly after me, he comes home. And he's all like "hi honey" but I'm having none of it. I think I made it clear that I was mad at him and that he had to do the laundry NOW. Although his first reaction started "can't I just -" but I went "NO YOU DO IT RIGHT NOW". And then he finally got that guilty look in his eyes and said "sorry Liz" and "okay okay I'll get started". But I wasn't finished with him. I said "there's something else, you're getting punished". And I swear his first thought was of something completely wrong and he looked at me with eyes full of mischief and went "punished?" like it was a game. Well I put my angry face right on and told him that it wasn't a game and that I was completely serious.

This was all right after he came home, so he was still wearing his coat - a very thick black down jacket which he bought last week. As I told you in another email, I thought it was a bit silly to buy that as he has another black down jacket that still seems fine to me, but I didn't care much. But now it had made me come up with an idea. So I told him to take off his jacket, and then handed him the old one to put on. He was all "why" but I quickly shut him up with my angry look. I had him zip it up all the way, then handed him his new jacket and made him put that on and also zip it up completely. Then I said "you'll wear these until the laundry is done, and if you take them off or even unzip them before then I'll kill you".

He started collecting all the clothes - four huge bags of them, I told you he had been postponing it for a LONG time. By the time he was ready to go, he was sweating. Then I said "come over here" and started putting up his hoods. Three of them; first a sweatshirt hood and then both very thick down hoods. I tied them all so just his face was barely showing. He looked like an arctic explorer by then! Except for the sweatdrops. He protested a bit because he was scared somebody would see him like that but I cut him off. "It's your punishment and I'm not joking about this. You'll go to the laundry like this. You can only take off your hoods once you're inside. You don't unzip your jackets. And before you leave you put your hoods up exactly like this. Understood?"

And he nooded meekly and went out the door. I stepped into the corridor and watched as he pushed the elevator button. I swear I saw his hands shake a bit and I understood why; what if someone was in the elevator when it arrived? So finally it arrives and he reaches to open it and startles! Sure enough our neighbour steps out of the elevator. He said something but I couldn't hear what. John mumbled something ("sorry" I think) and scrambles to get in the elevator with his four bags. The neighbour looks at the back of his enormous hood. I smile inwardly and quickly get inside and close the appartment door so the neighbour doesn't see me. They're a young couple who live in the appartment right next to us - I wonder if he told his girlfriend how John was dressed?

Anyway, I think my method worked. Later I passed by the laundry and looked through the window and saw him sitting there. The hoods were down but the jackets were still zipped up and the hoods were so thick they stood right behind his head. And when he got home they were up and tied exactly like before. (Would have been funny if the neighbours would just happen to leave when he arrived! But they didn't, luckily for him.) When he came in I told him to hang up all the laundry and only after he was finished he could take off his hoods. His reaction was "yes Liz"!

After he finished I took off his hoods and asked if he had learned his lesson now. And John said he knew he had deserved it. He's so cute when he says that!! :-) My mood was a lot better by then (although I wasn't really showing it to John yet) so I was kind of joking when I said "in the future if you don't do the chores, I'll dress you like that to do them. With some additions, if it keeps happening!" And he just looked at me earnestly (not realizing I was joking - I still had my Serious Face on!) and said "yes Liz, I think that's for the best, it'll make me behave better. I'm really sorry about this week." And I just embraced him and kissed him and I love him so much!

Sorry I've been rambling on about this but it was a pretty special moment and it's literally the only interesting thing to happen this week. And maybe it's crazy but I'm thinking I might actually have to do this again at some point - when his laziness takes the upper hand again. It seems like John even agrees with me on this! Maybe next time I'll make him wear my Moonboots as well - or I could put ducttape on his hood so he can't take it off while inside. There's a lot of possibilites here!

I have to end here - another long day at work tomorrow, so it's bed-time for me. John has promised to the groceries...

Love to Ida and the rest of the family,
Love you,
Your sis,
Liz





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